How To Stop Being A Victim In Your Life

The reason why you lack the results you want from your life is because you are behaving like a victim. Being a victim is so subconscious, that often you dont even know that you are a victim. How dangerous is that!

So today, I will help victims get out of this trap and achieve the success that you want. This is an incredibly valuable read for anyone so do invest the time for this knowledge today.

A Non-Victims Perspective On Victims

Fustratingly, when experienced individuals point out victim behaviours and mindsets, the victims first insinct is to get defensive, angry and fustrated at the expert for breaking their fantasies about the world.

Another common responce is "you dont get it, I actually am a victim". Victims assert; "You dont know whats it's like for me" and insist that somehow his special circumstances does not allow him to do what is needed for success.

A victim does not say "thank you for showing me that I'm a victim". Hahahaha! how nice would that be. But ultimately, that's why the victim does not achieve the results that he wants to achieve.

It is also important to highlight here is that anyone can become a victim, so dont think you're above this. As long as you are unsatisfied with some aspect of your life, you have subconcious victimhood wired within you.

Victim Talk

Victim really loves using very specific phrases. Your job is to catch these phrases and proceed to take massive action surrounding the thing you have victimized. Here are the phrases;

1. "I can't"
2. "It's impossible"
3. "It's too hard"
4. "Never"/"Always"
5. "I've already tried that"
6. "I never done that"
7. I must/need/have to do {certain action} and thats why I cant do it
8. I must/need/have {this} before I can....
9. {insert 3rd party} and thats why I cant!
10. I have all of these {reasons} and thats why!
11. Fear of faliure justification
12. I'm not good enough justification
13. It's too late for me justification
14. Unfairness justification
15. and many more... (please tell me more in the comments so I can add them)

100% Responsibility

To stop being a victim, it would be required for you to take 100% responsibility for all your results in your life. Blame, demonization and justification is all just smokescreen to allow you to stay a victim.

Now it's hard to stop being a victim because it's terrifying. Admitting 100% responsibility means that now you will have to work really hard. You much rather stay comfortable if you're being honest with yourself.

Below, I will discuss the things you need to seek once you have taken 100% responsibility. Remember, taking responsibility is a decision and a process, you make the decision to take responsibility and surrender to the process to absolve yourself from victimhood.

Practical Action #1 - Massive Action

When you take effective massive action, almost any problem can be solved. The key word here is "effective" because it's unlikely that you have found an effective solution yet. Consider that you have underestimated the amount of action you have taken.

An effective solution can only be found through massive trial and error runs until you find something that sticks. Once there is like some plimenary results coming from that action, focus in on that action to exploit and master it.

It essentially means, that in the beginning, your actions would be a "wide net" of potential solutions. As you countinue to discover and test solutions, you will start to see which one is more effective. Once you found the chosen effective stratergy, you zero in on it and pour all your attention and time into mastering it.

It's time for you to take your life into your own hands and cast the net of action and mastery.

Practical Action #2 - Creator Mindset

As you take more and more responsibility, you will eventually realize that life is what you make of it. It's all about making things from nothing. A creator does not care about competition and what other people thinks. The creator just focuses on what he wants to create.

The creator realizes that every single obstacle in his life have some sort of workaround and he is committed to find that solution to actualize what he is creating. He fundementally believes that he can cope or solve any problem he is dealing with.

Practical Action #3 - Mentors

Now that you've taken 100% responsibility, you would instinctually want to take action. Well, what action should you take? There is a wide variety of philosophies on how to do things, and virtually nobody agrees with one another. This is where mentors play a role.

The role of the mentor is to provide good instruction. To hand you down techniques that leads you to the path of mastery, the mentor also leverages his experience and help you avoid traps associated with the work.

Mentors can be books, freely avaliable information on the internet, or real life people you have deliberately seek out. If it provides you good instruction on what to practice, that is your mentor.

Good instruction must be alligned with your values. There is an infinite amount of possibilities you can walk through to reach the same point. Maybe my path requires you to swim but you cant! Similary, the values the mentor hold is the path he will walk.

Recognize that it is the wisdom and love of mentors that kept you alive on this planet. You have many mentors that have brought you to where you are today and you wouldn't have progressed without them.

Practical Action #4 - Defeating Procrastination

Another challenge of coming out of victimhood is procrastination. A very easy way to combat procrastination is to ask yourself, "What is the most difficult thing I can do right now" and do exactly that.

That will move you into the air of action and force you to do the things you dont want to do. Incredibly effective.

Practical Action #5 - Patience

When people hear they have to dedicate their life to pickup for one or two years, doing one or two thousand approaches to actually get good at pickup, they get really discouraged and feel defeated to start.

If you feel this way, that's because you do not acknowledge the actual value that pickup gives you. The reason why it's so hard is because the reward is massive. Realize that this reward of mastering pickup is rare, which is why it's so valuable.

Any amazing reward and achievement you make for yourself in your life requires a long time horizon and the consistency of action. In fact, the reward is so valuable for me, that even if you told me if it will take me 20 years, I would still do it.

Compassion For Victims

If you are an expert at something, I would recommend that you be more gentle and forgiving in the way you expose a victims mindset. Try not to be too harsh with the truth, as to the victim, his victimization is incredibly real for him.

Realize that you were once a victim yourself in their exact position. It was the working of an incredible wise master that showed you the path to success. Now you are that wise master, how will you excercise your wisdom? For good or bad?

Conclusion

Goodluck on defeating your victimhood. The results you want are just on the other side of that. Please do check out my other posts and practice everything holistically. You can see "coaching" to see if I have room to onboard new students.

Cheers,
FriendlyWrenChilling.